They are so fun. They are so cute. Maybe you’re a little lonely. Maybe you need the lightness in your life. Maybe you could use a friend…or a fan. Certainly, it’s good to spend lots of time with them, to show them the world together. Childcare is definitely expensive.

But you know what? Your kids are not little accessories for you to bring with you everywhere. They are not little pets for you to show off for attention. They are not an “emotional support human,” as Elon Musk has seriously described his child whom you have likely seen in pictures during rocket launches and in the Oval Office. They are not here for you to find comfort and companionship with.

Your kids deserve respect. They deserve privacy. They deserve boundaries. They deserve dignity. They deserve safety. They deserve days that are consistent and predictable. They deserve routine and security. They don’t just deserve these things, they need them.

Your needs, your whims, your ego, your entertainment? This is all secondary to put it mildly. Find some other way to fill yourself up, find some other little buddy—it’s not their job or their responsibility. Your responsibility is to them. They are not your emotional support human. You are theirs.