We’ve talked about how hard it is. We’ve talked about what it takes out of you. And you’ve felt it, so you know.

So why do people have kids? What’s the payoff?

It’s often in the very little things. Not the quality time, so many people seek, but in the garbage time. Moments on the couch. Laughing at something stupid in the car. Watching them smile when they get a treat.

“I’ve been playing Angry Birds with my older son lately,” Ezra Klein recently said. “And when we play it, I don’t think anybody enjoys anything as much as he enjoys playing Angry Birds with me. He just cackles. And it’s really beautiful. It’s really fun. There’s real pleasure in it.”

We often say here that the only way to teach your kids is by example—here’s what it means to have discipline and character and treat people with respect. But we don’t acknowledge nearly enough that our kids also teach us by example, too.

“A lot of the joy of parenting is not the joy of parenting,” Klein says. “It’s the joy of your child’s existence.”

And that’s the thing, isn’t it? Kids remind us, in their uninhibited laughter and their wide-eyed wonder, of the simple pleasures of being alive. They find joy in things we’ve long stopped noticing: the way a balloon floats, the crunch of leaves underfoot, the silliness of a game that doesn’t even matter. Kids remind us that life isn’t about the highlight reel or the grand achievements. It’s about being here, really here, for the little moments that make life worth living.