While comedian Pete Holmes and his wife Valerie were expecting, he ran into Rob Riggle, another comedian who you might remember from 21 Jump Street, Stepbrothers, and The Lorax. Riggle, who already had a family, had a piece of advice he wanted to pass along. “In Hollywood, nobody cares about your kids,” he told Pete with a smile.

He wasn’t making some sociopolitical point, but actually a pretty practical one in Hollywood, a town built around meetings. He was saying, don’t waste everyone’s time with stories about your kids. When you’re at work, be about business and then go home to your family and let everyone else do the same.

As much as our kids are the center of our universe, they aren’t the center of everyone else’s. Sure, we can sometimes connect over our shared experiences but let’s not presume…or impose. Not everyone has kids. Not everyone wants kids. And not everyone wants to hear about yours. It doesn’t mean they’re heartless—it just means they have their own lives, their own work, their own joys and struggles. That’s what’s central to them.

Love your kids fiercely. Talk about them with people who care. Just don’t forget Riggle’s advice: not everyone does. And that’s okay. Because what matters most is that you care—and that they’re central to your life.

P.S. Check out this clip of Pete Holmes talking about honesty and parenting when he was a guest of podcast recently!