It can sometimes feel like everything is falling apart, as we talked about recently. No one is behaving. No one is listening. Everyone is yelling. Causing problems. Making messes.

In exasperation you find yourself shouting What is going on? Why is everyone giving me such a hard time today?

But of course, that’s not what our kids are doing at all. They have no concept of this. In fact, what’s actually happening is they’re having a hard time.

Maybe they’re hungry, as we’ve talked about before. Or stressed by the mess. Maybe they’re scared. Maybe they’re hurting. Maybe they desperately need help but don’t have words. Maybe they’re just being exactly what they are…a kid!

Behavior is their language. Acting up or out–at almost every age–is their way of speaking up. They don’t mean for this to be hard for you…it’s just they are having such a hard time and can’t think about anyone else.

But you can. You have more tools than they do. More knowledge. More experience. More self-awareness. More empathy. And now is the time to use it. To make things easier for them, to help them through whatever is causing them trouble.