It’s a stereotype to be sure, and you’re not nearly as bad as some men.

…But that doesn’t make it okay. That sometimes you just do the minimum. That you blow stuff off. That you pretend not to know how to do things. That you assume your partner will take care of it. And then when you actually do do something-—you want a parade!

“And I want you to try so that I can thank you for tryin,’” Paris Paloma sings in “Stem the Flow,” “And then maybе that will make you try some more.” It’s pathetic. Your job is to do your job—to take care of your family, to carry your share of the load and then some.

Your spouse, your kids, want you to try. Is that so hard? To try to care? To try to notice? To look around and do what needs to be done (check out Eve Rodsky’s must-read Fair Play for more on this topic) before someone has to ask you?

They don’t need perfection. They don’t need some grand gesture. They need effort. They need attention. They need to know that the family you say matters most to you actually gets the best of you, too.

They just want you to try.

P.S. If you want to keep getting better at your most important job—parenting—you need more than good intentions. You need a practice. The Daily Dad Five Year Reflection Journal helps you build one.

Five minutes a day to reflect, reset, and show up better tomorrow. Watch as your daily practice informs your actions, helping you to become more present, patient, and intentional in your actions.

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