Eighteen years. That’s 72 seasons. It might seem like a lot, but in the grand scheme of things, it’s not. It’s a handful of summers as a baby. A few winters as a toddler. A couple springs as a teenager. Just as the seasons fold and unfold into the next, so does each era of a child’s life until suddenly, almost before you know it, they’re not a child anymore.
But the point here is not to make the same reminder you’ve heard a million times as a parent, the one we’ve made here before. Sure, tempus fugit cannot be forgotten (that’s why we carry a physical reminder of it), but the phrase ‘72 Seasons,’ as Metallica sings about in their song by that name, serves as a deeper reminder—those early seasons shape not just childhood, but the entire trajectory of a person’s life. The habits, emotions, and patterns picked up in those formative years linger long after childhood fades.
Where does our anger problem come from? It’s how we saw Dad deal with his emotions. Where does our self-esteem issue come from? From the way Mom responded to us as a kid. Where does our anxiety come from? It was from Mom and Dad’s unpredictability. Who we are is a result of what we saw and felt and were taught in those first 72 seasons.
And you know what? The same will be true for our kids.
Right now, we are putting a voice in their head. The voice they’re going to have for the rest of their lives—it’s being shaped right now. Their resentments. Their fears. Their values. It’s here, in their 33rd season, their 4th summer, their 9th year. The Metallica song is largely about the rage that Hetfield picked up from his father as well as from the tragic death of his mother (who as a Christian scientist refused medical treatment). It’s his “dominating birthright,” he sings. It’s a curse that haunts him, that surely haunts his own children now, too.
We have 72 seasons with our kids. How will we spend them? What will we give them? What will they take from them? Whatever we do, we better choose wisely.