Yeah, it costs money to heat a house warmer than it needs to be. Yeah, rooms should be clean. Yeah, it’s annoying when shoes are left in a pile. Yeah, you told them to knock that off already. 

But?

But what’s more important? There are rules, and then there are rules. Which one is this thing you’re nagging them about? Is it important enough to threaten your happy, peaceful home? Your relationship?

We started a new, longform podcast about parenting here at Daily Dad, and Nils Parker told the story of the constant fights his sister and his mom would have almost everyday about the plates his sister would leave under the living room chair after her afternoon snack. His mom was right. His sister wasn’t listening. But to this day, their relationship still simmers with mutual resentment. Over what? A plate.

You have to ask yourself: Why are you making such a big deal out of this? Is it really worth it? You can also ask yourself another question, one that Nils’ sister wished deep down for their mother to ask: Why are they struggling with this in the first place? What if we had a conversation, instead of another argument?

Years from now, you’re going to want to get along with your kids as adults, as parents themselves. You’re going to want them to have happy memories of their childhood. You’re not going to care about the little things that took up so much of your energy when they were younger. So don’t make such a big deal about them. Don’t ruin the present… and possibly the future over them.

Also check out our new Saturday episodes of the Daily Dad podcast!

P.S. This was originally sent on March 10, 2021. Sign up today for the Daily Dad’s email and get our popular 11 page eBook, “20 Things Great Dads Do Everyday.”