We all do it. Maybe it’s after we lose our patience and say something we wish we wouldn’t have. Maybe it’s after a busy day when, instead of a home-cooked meal, we pick up fast food. Maybe it’s after we give in and let them have extra iPad time. Maybe it’s after scrolling and seeing a bunch of “perfect” families on social media.

Whenever or however it happens, we’ve all found ourselves in a quiet moment, beating ourselves up—telling ourselves we’re failing, falling short, or simply not a good parent. Why did I do that? Why couldn’t I have been more patient? They’re going to hate me forever for this. I’m just like my dad. I’m exactly what I swore I wouldn’t become.

Are there any parents with good self-talk? Why are we so hard on ourselves? Why do we beat up on ourselves?

There’s a story we tell about Cleanthes in Lives of the Stoics: he once came upon a man in Athens beating himself up just like that. Cleanthes stopped him and said, “Hey, you’re not talking to a bad person.”

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if someone could do that to us as parents? To stop us and remind us that we’re not bad parents—that we’re doing our best, that we’re doing so much more than basically every generation in history, that our kids love us and appreciate what we do for them? Because it’s true. We have to remind ourselves and others walking this same path. We are not bad parents.

If you’re interested in joining a supportive community of parents, we’ve created the Daily Dad Society for exactly this reason. Together, we share challenges, celebrate wins, and provide each other with practical advice. Like Cleanthes lifting up the Athenian, we can assure each other that no, we are not bad parents, yes, we are doing our best, and we are learning and growing every day from our experiences.

Learn more and sign up today at dailydad.com/society.

We’d love to have you join us.