The need to understand that it’s never over. Not playtime, sometimes that does end. And yes, sometimes things do end—relationships, opportunities, phases of life.

But their ability to succeed? Their ability to start over and regroup and try again? This is something that they always have the chance to do. Ralph Waldo Emerson, in his famous “Self-Reliance” essay (​every parent should own it and every teenager should read it​) talks of “a sturdy lad from New Hampshire or Vermont, who in turn tries all the professions, who teams it, farms it, peddles, keeps a school, preaches, edits a newspaper, goes to Congress, buys a township, and so forth, in successive years, and always, like a cat, falls on his feet, is worth a hundred of these city dolls. He walks abreast with his days, and feels no shame in not ‘studying a profession,’ for he does not postpone his life, but lives already. He has not one chance, but a hundred chances.”

Your kids can be that kid. They are that kid. You are that kid. We talked a while back about how ​it’s never too late​ for us as parents—​to follow our dreams​, ​to repair relationships​, ​to pick up better habits​. The same is true for your kids, too. In fact, it’s especially true for them.

They need to know that life is not doing one thing, or even necessary doing the thing you think you’re supposed to be. No, ​it’s a process of going from one thing to the next​, of bouncing back after failures, of adapting to changes, of falling always on your feet. As we wrote back in February, ​Emerson said that we need to breathe​ into our kids a certain “recuperative force”—the ability to be resilient—a buoyancy, he said. Without this, he said, it was over for them. They have no chance. But if they do have this—as you do, as all humans have this capability—then it’s never over for them, they have unlimited chances and nothing can stop them.

P.S. Letting our kids struggle so they can build that “recuperative force” isn’t always easy—for us or them. But we find the Latin phrase “Luctor et Emergo”—which means “I struggle and overcome”—a useful mantra not to suffocate and isolate our kids by spoiling them. Grab the ​Luctor et Emergo challenge coin​ for you to carry around as a reminder to build the confidence and character your children need!