Nobody’s listening. Everyone is grouchy. Grades are slipping. Siblings are fighting. What is happening, one spouse says to another. Why are the kids such a mess today?

The answer is there in plain sight: The kids are a mess because things are a mess.

The dishes are piled up in the sink. The schedule and routine has been abandoned. Every surface is covered. Nobody has clean clothes. The front seat of the car hasn’t been cleaned out in weeks.

We’ve said before that behavior is the language of children. They are unable to express to you that they feel stressed out, overwhelmed, disoriented, disgusted, dirty….but they can act it out. They, like us, are products of their environment and when their environment is a disaster, so are they.

The good news is there’s an easy fix: Don’t admonish them, start picking stuff up. Get them to help too. Start small. Dig your way out. Get back to a rhythm, a routine, and a nice clean environment. It will make all the difference.